In contemplation

Certain events happened in the past months have made me think hard about my cancer, and I have come up with new realizations.

When I was first diagnosed with cancer, the tumour was 5cm big. As it had spread to the lymph nodes, it was considered as stage 3. Till today, I am convinced that the biopsy caused the cancer to spread to my lymph nodes.

I realized that with grade 3 cells and metastasis to the lymph nodes, the cancer was not completely obliterated. It did not go into remission. It has simply been brought under control.

I have the feeling that it was just hovering around waiting for an opportunity to surface again, which was why a chain of events caused a relapse less than a year after my surgery.

November 2009, an unexpectedly strong verbal attack by an acquaintance left me stunned and fuming mad that 3 days later, 2 small lumps appeared just below the surgical line.

August 2010, I had an altercation with a friend and two days later, one lymph node just below the right collar bone was affected. Another lymph node which had shrunk after I applied energy healing therapy became bigger.

I continued with energy healing therapy on these two lymph nodes and they were showing improvements when about a month ago, my husband got on my nerves that I lost control and the affected lymph nodes became bigger. There was also pain in one spot of the collar bone. Again, the energy healing therapy got rid of the pain.

Of late, I have been mostly feeling tired and I am aware that it is not a good sign.

I must add that I had been busy with other stuff and not having adequate rest. The conditions were just right for the lumps to re-appear.