One year after chemo

My last dose of chemo was on 12 June 2008. It's been one year since and what's my condition now?

My memory is still as bad as ever and I supposed it can only go downhill as I aged.

The lymphedema in my right arm is still as lymphedemic as ever. I am more or less resigned to live with it for the rest of my life, as massaging and wearing a sleeve did not seem to help much and was only a temporary relief. Every morning, I wake up with a numbness in my right shoulder as though it is water-logged. As the day wore on and with the help of gravity, fluid seemed to move back down my arm and my shoulder is free again.

I realised I have also partially lost my sense of smell, the subtle ones, that is. But I could still smell the pungent ones, like smoke and my son's perfume. Not sure if it was due to chemo or because when I was on oxygen, my nose used to bleed and I always had to remove the dried blood from my nostrils.

I am still having digestive problems, which is my biggest concern as it could cause me to pass out, and I really hated that as I lose control over myself. I have to be very careful with what I eat, like avoiding food which are hard to digest, and also to ensure that my stomach does not stay hungry for too long. I have had several episodes of fainting spells and sometimes with excruciating pain in the duodenum. Very often, when my stomach feels bloated, I can also feel slight pain on the right side (duodenum?) of my stomach.

My legs are still weak, especially my knees which are tender when touched. I still require effort to stand up from a squating position. When standing up and walking away from a sitting position, the soles of my feet hurt.

I am still as lethargic as ever. I tire easily and need a lot of sleep. If I was out for a few hours, and depending on how much running around I have done, it would usually take me one to two days to recharge and recover.

The skin on my hands have become super sensitive, dry, cracked and itchy, even though I used cream and oils on them and also minimise washing as much as possible. I am still scratching them as I typed. I wonder if they will ever recover so that I can get on with the cooking, washing and cleaning.

I get slight breathlessness when walking up a slope or climbing stairs. The worst is when I rushed to catch the train. By the time I got into the train, I would really get breathless, almost "duan qi" and have to breathe like crazy for a few minutes to get my breath back.

Since January this year, I had a pea-sized lump on my right side above the elbow level. It is hard but not painful to the touch. The skin is always reddish and the lump has become slightly bigger now. I don't know what the heck it is - could be a cyst. Anyway, it's on my onco's records, and it's no cause for concern. I am monitoring it and it is not giving me problems.

Other than that I am doing fine and is out and running around. I supposed I just need to be patient and exercise more.

I have read from some website that sometimes it takes 10 years or longer to recover from the side-effects of chemo. 10 years, hah! Either the side-effects outlast me or I outlive the side-effects. Only time can tell.